From his loving Aunty, Dr. Antonia Nwogbo
Emeka Valentine Jideonwo was my oldest nephew and the first of all my nephews and nieces. He was also the first grandson of our parents. His mother, Juliete, my older sister, brought him into our lives as a beautiful, cheerful, happy, and loving child — and from the moment she brought him home, Emeka became my baby.
There are no words adequate enough to describe how much I loved Emeka. From babyhood, he was a joyful child. He was beautiful, robust, and full of life, and he laughed all the time. Everyone who encountered him seemed to fall in love with him. But for me, the bond was especially profound. I took over caring for him, and he quickly became a very special part of my heart.
When Emeka was three years old, his parents migrated to America with him. I was devastated. Losing that daily closeness with my little boy was incredibly difficult. Yet, life gave us the gift of reunion. When I eventually migrated to America, I was reunited with Emeka at about age 15 and lived with his family. Although he was no longer the little boy I had cared for, the love between us had never disappeared. Our relationship simply entered another chapter.
One of the things I will always remember with a smile is how much Emeka loved to joke about my discipline. He would tell stories about how strict his Aunty was — how I made him work hard, how I expected discipline and responsibility, and how I would wake him up at what he called “ungodly hours” in the early morning so that we could go jogging before he got ready for school. He had plenty of stories about my “mean” ways and the many strict things I made him do.
And he loved telling those stories!
But Emeka never ended those stories without also saying:
“Aunty, thank you! I appreciate you, and I appreciate all that you did. That is why I am disciplined. You helped me to be responsible and helped me become the person I am today.”
Those words will remain forever in my heart. Because behind every early morning wake-up, every jog, every demand that he work hard, and every correction was an Aunty who loved him beyond measure. I wanted him to become strong. I wanted him to be disciplined, responsible, focused, and prepared for life. I wanted him to understand that his abilities could take him far if he was willing to work hard and remain committed to his goals.
And Emeka became exactly that kind of man.
He grew into a caring, loving, kind, dependable, disciplined, and responsible man. He was a devoted son, brother, father, and parent. He was diligent and focused on his goals. Emeka had a vision for his life, and he pursued that vision with a well-planned mission. He did not simply dream about the life he wanted; he worked toward it with purpose, determination, and discipline.
Perhaps, in God’s greater plan for his life, Emeka was given the responsibility of fatherhood early. As a result, he was blessed to become a grandfather relatively early in life, leaving behind four grandchildren — beautiful young lives, now ages 9, 8, 4, and 4 — and four children, a girl and three boys.
Through them, and through his children, a part of Emeka will continue to live. His laughter will live in their memories. His values will live through the lessons he taught them. His strength will live through the lives he influenced. His love will live in the hearts of everyone who knew him. And his legacy will continue through his children and grandchildren.
When I think of Emeka, I will remember that beautiful, joyful little boy who laughed so freely and captured everyone’s heart. I will remember the young man who teased his Aunty about all the ways I disciplined him. I will remember the man who, despite all his jokes about my strictness, had the wisdom and humility to say, “Aunty, thank you.”
Those words tell me that he understood. He understood that my discipline was love. He understood that my expectations came from believing in him. He understood that I wanted the very best for him. And most importantly, he knew that he was deeply, profoundly, and unconditionally loved.
Emeka, you were my first nephew. You were my first baby among all my nieces and nephews. You occupied a special place in my heart from the moment you entered this world, and nothing — not distance, not time, and not even death — can erase that love.
I thank God for giving me the privilege of loving you, caring for you, watching you grow, and being part of the man you became. I will miss you more than words can express. I will carry our memories with me always. And whenever I think of you, I will hear that joyful little boy’s laughter, and I will remember my Emeka — the child who became a remarkable man, a father, a grandfather, a son, a brother, and a blessing to his family.
Rest peacefully, my beloved Emeka. Your life mattered. Your love mattered. Your presence mattered. And your legacy will live on.
With all my love, forever,
Your Loving Aunty, Dr. Antonia Nwogbo
